Monday, November 9, 2009


Who is the most overpaid actress in history? Could it really be Nicole Kidman? Shes definitely not my favorite actress. The Hollywood Reporters annual list of Hollywood�s highest earning actresses has been released.

1. Nicole Kidman
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Nicole Kidman, makes Dollers16 mil 17 mil. What she should be earning:dollers1 mil. That's right, I'm saying that Nicole should be paying film companies to hire her, not the other way around. Thats because she is poison at the box office, the female equivalent of Sean Penn. Women dislike her, men dont think she is sexy, and those Chanel ads induce nausea. My guess is Nicoles rate dates back to Sony Pictures overpaying her for that bomb Bewitched. Since then, she is been doing smaller films, but is signing for studio projects right now. Note to majors save your dollers and hire Reese or Angelina.
2. Reese Witherspoon

Reese Witherspoon, doller15 mil. What she should be earning: dollers 25 mil. Reese can do no wrong. Women love her, men love her, the camera loves her. And she is smart: when she was looking for a new agency, she lamented not owning her Legally Blonde character because it'll be Broadway bound. Which doesnt mean all her films are great, but she's always great in them. She opens a movie.
3. Renee Zellweger

Renee Zellweger, dollers 15 mil. What she should be earning. dollers 5 mil. Renee doesnt open movies, unless the material is Bridget Jones-cloned. She's fine as the wife or girlfriend, but then her price needs to be cut by a third. Worse, audiences are getting sick of her changing hair color whenever she changes parts. Thats a dye job, not an acting job. Sadly, she is lost her once winning girl next door quality; now she is trying to be a fashion diva.
4. Drew Barrymore
Drew Barrymore, dollers15 mil. What she should be asking: 3 mil. Drew has
never been able to open a movie, and she never will. That doesnt mean
she isnt sweet onscreen, but lately her roles have been too
saccharine. If only she had bring back that Poison Ivy edginess she once
had. Women like her but they don't want to be her or even briefly
married to Tom Green, whereas men dont think she is hot anymore.
Drew's price should go up when she grows up.
5. Cameron Diaz

Top 10 Hollywood Actresses
Cameron Diaz, dollers15 mil. What she should be asking: 7 mil. Put her in a
bikini, and she is worth it. Put her in a chick flick In Her Shoes, The
Holiday, and she is not. Everyone finds her sexy, but women dont like
her. It is jealousy. And not just because of Justin. Plus, she simply
doesn't have much range as an actress from the neck up.

6. Halle Berry

Top 10 Hollywood Actresses
Halle Berry, dollers14 mil. What she should be asking:5 mil. Once she lost
her shot at launching a new franchise as 007s Jinx, she lost what
should have been her biggest paydays. Alas, she is now the wrong side of
40, and Hollywood is cruel that way.

7. Charlize Theron

Top 10 Hollywood Actresses
Charlize Theron, dollers10 mil. What she should be asking: 10 mil. A smart
actress, surrounded by smart people, doing smart roles. Just don't fuck
it up with too many vanity projects like North Country.

8. Angelina Jolie

Top 10 Hollywood Actresses
Angelina Jolie, dollers10 mil. What she should be asking: 25 mil. There is no
one hotter and cooler right now than Angelina onscreen and off just
ask the stalkarazzi, but that could change if she starts auditioning
for sainthood by making too many message movies. Lets hope she's too
bad ass for that.

9. Kirsten Dunst

Top 10 Hollywood Actresses
Kirsten Dunst, dollers8 mil to10 mil. What she should be asking: dollers1 mil.
Eventually, the Spider Man franchise will end. Marie Antoinette dying
in theaters didnt help her price. She was an idiot not to star in
Bring It On sequels for big bucks. She is not sexy enough and she wont
age well with audiences. This is a career about to end.

10. Jennifer Aniston

Top 10 Hollywood Actresses
Jennifer Aniston, dollers8 mil. What she should be asking: 1 mil. She is not
a movie star. She is a TV star. Big difference. Most of all, she is not
an interesting actress. She cant open a movie, and her choice of
material is abysmal. Sure, The Break Up did okay business, but that was
because of Vince and in spite of her. Soon she will be lucky to score the
next Lifetime movie.


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